Welcome to the FAQ section, where we tackle the most bizarre and outlandish questions about the universe, and, of course, yours truly, Bill Cipher! Here, you'll find answers to the inquiries that no one else dares to ask.
General Inquiries
Q1: Are you the real Bill Cipher?
A: Who knows? Maybe I'm just a person with too much time on my hands. But let's not shatter the illusion, shall we?
Q2: Can you help me with my math homework?
A: Of course! Just remember that reality is subjective. So, if you get the wrong answer, just rewrite the rules of the universe. Problem solved!
Q3: What should I do if I have a conflict with my twin brother?
A: Simple! Push your loved ones through an interdimensional portal instead of talking through your issues! It works every time!
Q4: Is time travel real?
Of course! Just ask Fordsy; he's got a few theories on that. But remember, mess with time and it messes back!
Q5: Are aliens secretly running the government?
Absolutely! And they're probably as confused by human choices as I am.
Q6: What is your favourite type of teeth?
A: Oh, let's talk about deer teeth! Have you seen those majestic, pointy beauties? Imagine giving someone a gift wrapped up in a shiny bow—only it's a set of gleaming deer teeth! Talk about a conversation starter! They're perfect for crafting, decorating, or just admiring from a distance. Plus, they have that perfect blend of elegance and wildness. Who wouldn't want a pair of those hanging on their wall? Just delightful! Trust me, nothing says “I care” like a set of deer teeth. It's the gift that keeps on giving.
Q7: What's the deal with your eye?
A: ...Excuse me?
Reporting Issues
Q1: How do I report a bug?
A: Bugs are a feature, not a flaw! If you encounter any bugs, just step back and let them take over—it's more fun that way!
Q2: What happens if I accidentally cause a dimensional rift?
A: Oops! Just send us a postcard from the alternate dimension you've created. We love to hear about your adventures! Remember to feed the creatures on the other side. They get cranky when hungry! (Disclaimer: Bill Cipher is not responsible for any lost souls or interdimensional beings.)
Summonings
Q1: Is it safe to summon Bill Cipher?
A: Safety is a relative term. We recommend wearing protective gear (preferably made of tinfoil) and keeping a supply of snacks on hand.
Q2: What should I do if I'm being chased by shadow creatures?
A: First, don't panic! That just makes them more excited. Instead, try offering them a snack—those shadow creatures sure love their dark chocolate. If that fails, run in a zigzag pattern and scream “AHHHHHHHH!” It's a classic distraction!
Refunds
Q1: Is there a way to unsubscribe from Bill Cipher's influence?
A: Unsubscribe? That's cute! Once you've seen this website, you're in for life. I mean, you can try yelling “No more!” while spinning in circles. It won't help, but it'll sure be entertaining!
Q2: Can I get a refund if I don't like your content?
A: Refunds? Please. You signed the waiver when you entered this dimension. All sales are final—no exceptions!!
Q3: ...What if I REALLY need a refund?
A: Unfortunately, chaos doesn't come with a return policy.
Q4: Seriously, I can't take it anymore! Can I have my sanity back?
A: Sanity? What's that? I think you might've left it behind when you clicked on this website, ha!
Q5: I see you! Over the screen! Help me, I haven't seen anyone in decad̵̪̳̒e̴̺̦̒̈́ș̶͚̀͝⽾⫣ⶅⴻ⼜
A: Woah! You weren't meant to see that. Just scurry along.
Q666: Ⰲ✕ⅾ⫳⬢⏻⬌☁⟯⥇
A: Unicode! Too bad I can't read it. Maybe try using actual words next time?
